Virtual Dating

It has become apparent that my inconsistency of writing has become the norm. Life happens to be chaotic and at present times I have just lost the motivation to maintain my writing. Of course, I created this blog as an outlet for my thoughts but as of lately, or the past few months, I quite legitimately have not had the time to just think or reflect on conversational topics. My mind has been filtered with the stresses of law school and work. In between, I managed to fit in a holiday to Brisbane to visit an old friend from Madrid, but besides that, I have quite literally just been studying and working.

As more time goes by, I find myself reminiscing less and less about Madrid. Which makes the continuation of my Madrid blogs a task that was originally exciting and nostalgic, less and less appealing and more daunting. Of course, I will eventually finish my Madrid posts when I find myself in the right headspace to recap my experience. But right now, I have put my Madrid experience on a halt. It now seems like that whole trip was lifetimes ago.

Last week, my friend introduced me to the world of virtual dating or, online dating. It’s been the first area of topic that has got me in the air about how I feel about it so I thought it was the perfect topic to resuscitate my idle blog. Social media has dominated society within the past decade so naturally, everything has become so accessible over the internet, including dating. As an old school type of girl, I was never really interested in all the hype about dating websites or apps. I always felt like those outlets were made for very superficial and harshly, desperate types of people. I also had the idea in my mind that people that were on these sites were purely looking for ‘fun’. Some still do, but as it turns out, not all are. Quite surprisingly after I joined Tinder, there are genuine guys out there, and females I’m sure, that are just looking to meet new, like-minded people. Nevertheless, I have also come across sleazy guys who just happen to be looking for sex, sometimes they even express that in their public bio!

The only thing that doesn’t resonate well with me is the whole meeting a person over the internet idea. How did the world become so sophisticated that meeting people over the internet has become so much more prominent that approaching a girl at the bar? All you get is a few pictures of the person and perhaps a description in their bio if you’re lucky. Based on that, you swipe if you think you guys are compatible. It all seems a little superficial to me. Whilst it might be hypocrisy because I, myself am on the site, but it always leaves a bitter feeling inside when I ‘swipe left’ because I don’t feel that someone is compatible with me based on their looks. Attraction matters, of course, but it definitely isn’t the be all or end all factor in meeting people. What if there was a site that you could only write a descriptive bio or introduction about yourself, hobbies and interests and no pictures could be exchanged? Would that then truly reflect the idea of people like minded people or people that you get along with?

Social media has just blown up that now, I could barely recall anyone that has met their significant other through a raw exchange of interests at a bar or event. Most people in this generation (Gen Y) has met people through Facebook, Instagram or dating apps. It is so easy to like someone’s photo on Instagram and perhaps slide in their dm’s to organise to meet them. But it’s so much harder, and rare, to now approach a stranger standing across the hall who is intensely gazing at the same sporting gig as you, or the girl at the bar who is talking to her friends. It could be the old school gene in me that has got me quite frustrated with the commercial dating means now-a-days but I’ve definitely got to say that most girls will be more impressed with an introduction in person than a DM.

Whilst my stint on Tinder is not to find anything long term, and by no means am I intending to be on there for ‘fun’, I am simply on there to meet new people with similar interests that can hold a conversation and perhaps the occasional catch up for coffees or drinks. We all have the perception these days that people can’t just want to meet new people for the sake of it and there always has to be an ultimatum like wanting to find a relationship or the literal opposite, to just sleep with them. But some old schoolers will agree with me that there are people out there who just purely want to meet new friends and bond over quirky and conversational things.

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